Silent jealousy

My today's mood can be described by a song

Silent jealousy (X-Japan).

Here are lyrics:

I'm looking for you

Trying to reach your roses

Carried away by the time

when being smashed by a maddening silence

You've gone away

From the stage

Leaving no words

There's just fake tears left

I look for a bouquet of roses decorated by pearls of fiction

I'm blind insane

In the red of silence

Now I've lost your love

a puppet fed by a illusssional love

Get me on my feet

Get me back to myself

Pretend you love me

look at me dyed in a scarlet up to my fingertips

I can not stand this serenade of loneliness

floating in a sea of virtual images

even if I hold my feelings

a bloodstained angel

has already woken up from a dream

I can not stop

Silent Jealousy

Don't you leave me alone

Falling into a sadness

decorated by a love that can not come back

in a middle of repetitive loneliness

Tell me true Wherever I go

I can learn to love this pain

I still want your love Stop this love

Erase the memory blooming into madness

I just wanted to stay with you

I just wanted to feel your breath of grace

I didn't know what to do

I couldn't say anything

When consciousness returned

Everything had been washed away

by the tide of time, even you

But the scars of memory never fade away

I can't stop loving you

Stop my tears

Stop my loving

Kill my memories

You dyed my heart in blood

No way to kill my sadness

Before leaving kill me

I am not able to see anything by my eyes

full of mad love

even now I miss you

Can't live without you

Silent Jealousy Falling in a dream

the memory that I hold

Stay in yesterday stop the time

Erase this repetitve loneliness

Take me back to the memory, to the dream

Silent Jealousy

Don't you leave me alone

Falling into a sadness

Kill me, Love

(Japanese part translated by me

from here

sorry for a bad style, but

I do not have an experience with songs)

Still thinking about Kamijo...

or rather two Kamijos...

I love them in very different way,

but I still love them both^^

Like two different people...

My depression continues...

but thanks to my friends I feel much better.

Not everything is lost yet!

I am really happy to have such amazing friends...

I am not even worth them... 

And I read in tumlbr 

that before Versailles concert in France

flyers about Satsuki's concert

were distributed!

*nervously waiting for news*

Next dreamed concert?

Yay!